I felt like being spied on.And I hate it.:(
Helping my Friend
16 years ago
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
undistinguished caller
October- a few 5am calls.A few disturbed deep sleeps. How stupid is he to say that he just wanted to chat with me at that time of the day.LIE. Maybe he must have lied better.His details does not relate in anyway.What a jerk thinking I'm that easy to fool.
November-A few 11pm calls.How unlucky is he,I am always asleep every time he calls. But he is still fortunate, coz I won't be able to shout at him and displace all my stress unto him.
December- The recurrence of early morning calls. It's 2 in the morning this time. I don't get the trend of his calls.I don't know why he can't speak words other than hello. He knew I answered the call,yet he's that stupid not to tell it right a way what he wants me to know. Gee, I really don't know who's the owner of that voice. And it's starting to freak me out. I can sense frustration from his voice when he is about to drop the call.
What must I do?
November-A few 11pm calls.How unlucky is he,I am always asleep every time he calls. But he is still fortunate, coz I won't be able to shout at him and displace all my stress unto him.
December- The recurrence of early morning calls. It's 2 in the morning this time. I don't get the trend of his calls.I don't know why he can't speak words other than hello. He knew I answered the call,yet he's that stupid not to tell it right a way what he wants me to know. Gee, I really don't know who's the owner of that voice. And it's starting to freak me out. I can sense frustration from his voice when he is about to drop the call.
What must I do?
How could you be so heartless?
Life is beautiful.Everything I see is a work of love.His love.
Yet I don't understand why in this lovely world comes a heartless creation.
If you don't like me, I don't care. I don't care about you anyway. You're just ruining my life.
You sound so good, yet you just mind yourself.
You seem so perfect to others, yet you're my culprit.
You're fooling me in anyway you can.And guess what?I know you're lying!
How could you?
How could you mind doing that?You're so selfish.
How could you take me to risk and you're in a safe shelter.
How could you demand so much and you're not even doing yours.
How could you teach me to listen, yet you're deaf when I try to talk.
How could you guarantee it all,in the end I take charge of the matter.
How dare you pretend that you pity me.You're words are cheap.I know you're not even bothered.
How could you be so heartless?
Yet I don't understand why in this lovely world comes a heartless creation.
If you don't like me, I don't care. I don't care about you anyway. You're just ruining my life.
You sound so good, yet you just mind yourself.
You seem so perfect to others, yet you're my culprit.
You're fooling me in anyway you can.And guess what?I know you're lying!
How could you?
How could you mind doing that?You're so selfish.
How could you take me to risk and you're in a safe shelter.
How could you demand so much and you're not even doing yours.
How could you teach me to listen, yet you're deaf when I try to talk.
How could you guarantee it all,in the end I take charge of the matter.
How dare you pretend that you pity me.You're words are cheap.I know you're not even bothered.
How could you be so heartless?
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
I'm a fool
I had a nice convo yesterday with my crush a long time ago and suddenly we we're up to getting married.Oh my geee.I know we we're just fooling around.But partly,I wish it was true. We really made a nice future plan. He even said he's willing to go where I'll be.There is some sincerity I felt,but we are not in a relationship. I won't expect anything,it will just bring me to depression. But I really enjoyed that convo we had,though in the end it is all a game.
A red Christmas for me.
A red Christmas for me.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
dated:last week of october
I AM NOT A TRASH!
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THAT TO ME.YOU MORON!
YOU DON'T DESERVED TO BE RESPECTED!
You always lower my self-esteem. You only see the least of me. All you've said and done already marked. I'm going to patch it up and It will heal soon.
You will never control me. And I know it frustrates you.I feel I am not good enough to you, I can accept that.I know I will never please such a kind.And I will make no more effort.
I am beautiful,whatever you say.Your words can't bring me down. I WILL RECOVER. And I WILL BE BACK. I WILL BE BETTER. And you'll be sorry for what you did. I am not a toy,I am no robot nor your follower,that would say yes to you, that would bow to you. You are not my master, I only have one.
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THAT TO ME.YOU MORON!
YOU DON'T DESERVED TO BE RESPECTED!
You always lower my self-esteem. You only see the least of me. All you've said and done already marked. I'm going to patch it up and It will heal soon.
You will never control me. And I know it frustrates you.I feel I am not good enough to you, I can accept that.I know I will never please such a kind.And I will make no more effort.
I am beautiful,whatever you say.Your words can't bring me down. I WILL RECOVER. And I WILL BE BACK. I WILL BE BETTER. And you'll be sorry for what you did. I am not a toy,I am no robot nor your follower,that would say yes to you, that would bow to you. You are not my master, I only have one.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
"I think I need time for myself. I need solitude. I dunno, I just thought about it. I miss my "SHOPPING-ALONE-ON-WEEKENDS" thing. Hmm, it made me think of watching Made of Honor by myself once it's shown. Excited"- taken from my friends post.
Geee...another realization. That I am not the only who appreciates solitude.
Being alone ain't that bad, let's just say that I am used to it,I guess.Been alone for about 22yrs,and will be 23 in about 22hours,hehe.It is the time that I am carefree.I can do whatever I want, eat what I like,go where I'd love too, with no worries at all. Sometimes I call myself a loner,but I am not antisocial.I actually got a bundle of friends.I love being with them,and I love being alone too. Guess, I just like living with no worries.Yeah that's right.
Actually,I have an escape plan in mind.Of course,I wont share it here.I'm crossing my fingers that I will be able to pursue it. I dont know if it is really called an escape plan,but maybe applicable,because it will only be me who knows where I will be.Alone,being myself and having a great time.Geee,I am really looking forward to it.
Geee...another realization. That I am not the only who appreciates solitude.
Being alone ain't that bad, let's just say that I am used to it,I guess.Been alone for about 22yrs,and will be 23 in about 22hours,hehe.It is the time that I am carefree.I can do whatever I want, eat what I like,go where I'd love too, with no worries at all. Sometimes I call myself a loner,but I am not antisocial.I actually got a bundle of friends.I love being with them,and I love being alone too. Guess, I just like living with no worries.Yeah that's right.
Actually,I have an escape plan in mind.Of course,I wont share it here.I'm crossing my fingers that I will be able to pursue it. I dont know if it is really called an escape plan,but maybe applicable,because it will only be me who knows where I will be.Alone,being myself and having a great time.Geee,I am really looking forward to it.
Monday, October 19, 2009
thoughts of a wandering mind
Geee..got no idea of what to write again.I miss cora,my cheerleader to my frustrated side of writing.hehe
Maybe,will write my funny thought yesterday.When I was walking across the street to go the mall, I noticed how my mind behave when I walk, when I ride a jeep or when I go to a place to stroll. It's like I'm observing what people around me does. And my eyes are very good accomplice.Maybe that's why I am not blessed with good vision.LOL. Coz I might recognize even smaller details. A lot told me words such as " Napansin mo yun?" or like " Really, d q napansin." Is that personal awareness or I just have a wandering mind?....Weee, I thought to myself yesterday good thing that there's no such thing like Edward Cullen .I sounded funny right?lol. I'll pity him if he try to read my mind.Got random thoughts, one after another.hahahaha.
We'll I guess, I am just sensitive to details or more likely I am just a wide-awake type of. But I really do love this thing, there's a lot more to know-observe-perceive-see-notice. hahahaha
Maybe,will write my funny thought yesterday.When I was walking across the street to go the mall, I noticed how my mind behave when I walk, when I ride a jeep or when I go to a place to stroll. It's like I'm observing what people around me does. And my eyes are very good accomplice.Maybe that's why I am not blessed with good vision.LOL. Coz I might recognize even smaller details. A lot told me words such as " Napansin mo yun?" or like " Really, d q napansin." Is that personal awareness or I just have a wandering mind?....Weee, I thought to myself yesterday good thing that there's no such thing like Edward Cullen .I sounded funny right?lol. I'll pity him if he try to read my mind.Got random thoughts, one after another.hahahaha.
We'll I guess, I am just sensitive to details or more likely I am just a wide-awake type of. But I really do love this thing, there's a lot more to know-observe-perceive-see-notice. hahahaha
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
looking for solace
I am currently listening to westlife's version of home. Home has always been my soundtrack each time I travel from one place to another.In place I love to settle, I call home. Now, I cling to this song over and over.Does it mean I am going to change place?The home I have in mind is Manila.It's not that I am hating where I stay, but it's just kinda hard to breath.Maybe, because of pressure/stress overload.And suddenly, my plans was distorted and my mind is beginning to form another tract to take. Or maybe, this is just pre-birthday blues.It's becoming habitual, actually. Started 2007,and I don't know why.Or there's just lot of memories I miss during my birth month.Gee...solace, where can I find you? I want to be back to my at ease nd simple though alike days.It's all the same yet I have peace of mind.Help me Lord..
Friday, October 2, 2009
where's equality?
To steal a few seconds from our busy life is a part of this noble profession,as they call it.Like this snapshot, my colleagues stole a few seconds from their work to post for a happy smile. Few hours to bond, few hours to have fun.Being a nurse is a demanding job.I have no regret being in this world, but sometimes it's hard to face and simply submit ourselves to what they say or go with how they want it to be. We are also human,human of the same rights as much as they claim.
I don't know when we will have a replica of this photo again.But looking forward to it, guess the answer is back to my first sentence.To steal again.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Soliel
OH men, don't how to get started with this one. Anyway,welcome to my frustrated side of writing.lol Finally, today the sun is shining in Manila. I am very happy that my family and friends is okei and safe at home.
I dont really have any topic for today, just the word soliel,the only thing in my mind. In english, it is the sun.I always have it mind and I dont know why.I guess I just love the word sunshine.This is just one thing a lot of people don't know yet about me, and I guess so.Life has many challenges to offer, we don't need to linger with it long,coz there will always be a bright side-soliel.God Bless guys.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
